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Darlene Deibler Rose
Darlene Diebler Rose: Unwavering Faith in Godâs Promises
âRemember one thing, dear: God said he would never leave us nor forsake us.â Those words were spoken on March 13, 1942, and were the last words Darlene Diebler would ever hear from her husband, Russell, as they were permanently separated in Japanese prison camps during World War II. She was a missionary in her early twenties. She did not even have a chance to say goodbye. Consider her own reflection on that heartbreaking day:
Everything had happened so fast and without the slightest warning. Russell had said, âHe will never leave us nor forsake us.â No? What about now, Lord? This was one of the times when I thought God had left me, that he had forsaken me. I was to discover, however, that when I took my eyes off the circumstances that were overwhelming me, over which I had no control, and looked up, my Lord was there, standing on the parapet of heaven looking down. Deep in my heart he whispered, âIâm here. Even when you donât see me, Iâm here. Never for a moment are you out of my sightâ (Evidence Not Seen, 46).
Obedience to Godâs Call in All Circumstances
Darlene Mae McIntosh was born on May 17, 1917. At age nine she put her trust in the Lord Jesus Christ as her light and salvation. One year later, during a revival service, she sensed Godâs calling to give her life to missions. On that night she promised Jesus, âLord, I will go anywhere with you, no matter what it costsâ (46). How could that little girl know what the Savior had planned for her in the not too distant future?
âThrough it all, Darlene was sustained by God, who never left her nor forsook her, just as he promised. He remained her light and salvation.â
Darlene married a pioneer missionary to Southeast Asia named Russell Deibler on August 18, 1937. She was only nineteen years old. He was twelve years her senior. The Deiblers eagerly returned to Russellâs pioneer missionary work in the interior of New Guinea. Darlene accompanied Russell into the jungle to establish a new mission station near a previously unevangelized, primitive tribe that had only been discovered just a few years earlier. Darlene, the first white woman any of them had ever seen, grew to deeply love the local people.
When World War II broke out in that part of the world, the Dieblers chose to stay. And when the Japanese soon took control of the area, the Deiblers were put under house arrest. Later, Japanese soldiers herded all foreigners into prisoner-of-war camps, separating the men from the women and children. During the next four years, Darlene endured separation from her husband and, eventually, widowhood.
The brutal conditions of a WWII Japanese internment camp included near-starvation, forced labor, inhumane conditions, false accusations of espionage, serious illnesses, solitary confinement, and torture. Through it all, Darlene was sustained by God, who never left her nor forsook her, just as he promised. He remained her light and salvation.
God Is Sufficient in All Circumstances
After receiving the news of her husbandâs death, Darlene was falsely accused of being a spy and taken to a maximum-security prison where she was kept in solitary confinement. Written over the door of her cell were the words in Indonesian, âThis person must die.â Frequently she was taken to an interrogation room and accused of spying. Upon her denial, her interrogators would strike her at the base of the neck or on her forehead above the nose.
There were times she thought they had broken her neck. She walked around often with two black eyes. âBloodied but unbowedâ (141), she never wept in front of her captors, but when she was back in her cell she would weep and pour out her heart to the Lord. When she finished, she would hear him whisper, âBut my child, my grace is sufficient for thee. Not was or shall be, but it is sufficientâ (141).
âWhen she finished, she would hear him whisper, âBut my child, my grace is sufficient for thee. Not was or shall be, but it is sufficient.ââ
Time and time again God showed himself to be powerful and faithful to Darlene. Once, within moments of being beheaded as a spy, she was unexpectedly taken from the maximum-security prison back to her original prison camp. The Lord again had heard her prayers, leading her to a level path against her enemies. Over and over again, Darlene could look back at her life and see how God had strengthened and sustained her
as a young bride at age nineteen.
when she headed to the jungles of New Guinea at twenty.
when placed under house arrest by the Japanese when she was twenty-five.
when she and her husband were separated into separate prison camps in 1942, never to see each other again in this life.
as she ate rats, tadpoles, dogs, runny oatmeal, and maggots, and other unimaginable foods.
through dengue fever, beriberi, malaria, cerebral malaria, dysentery, beatings, torture, attacks of rabid dogs, false charges of espionage, the promise of beheading, solitary confinement, Allied bombings, and many other inhumane abuses.
when told of the death of her beloved husband and his own tortures and sufferings.
when he brought her home to America but kept the fire of missions burning in her soul.
when he brought another missionary into her life, Gerald Rose, whom she married (1948) and returned with him to New Guinea in 1949.
as she labored on the mission field of Papua New Guinea and the Outback of Australia for over forty years, evangelizing, teaching, building landing strips, delivering babies, facing down headhunters, and loving them to Jesus.
On February 24, 2004, Darlene Diebler Rose quietly passed away and entered into the presence of the King she so deeply loved and faithfully served. She was eighty-seven years old. All throughout her life, when sharing her story, Darlene would say, âI would do it all again for my Savior.â No doubt many in New Guinea are grateful for her devotion. May we follow this great saint to the nations, for the sake of their souls and the glory of our great King Jesus.
the great prize in christian dating - pursue clarity and postpone intimacy
I got lots of things wrong in dating, but as I think back over my mistakes and failures â dating too young, jumping from relationship to relationship, not being honest with myself or with others, failing to set or keep boundaries, not listening to friends and family, not prizing and pursuing purity â one error rises above the others, and in many ways explains the others: My dating relationships were mainly a pursuit of intimacy with a girlfriend, not clarity about whether to marry her. In my best moments, I was pursuing clarity through  intimacy, but in a lot of other moments, if Iâm honest, I just wanted intimacy at whatever cost. âThe pursuit of marriageâ was a warm and justifying pullover to wear over my conscience when things started to go too far physically and emotionally. But even clarity through  intimacy misses the point and gets it backwards. I should have been pursuing clarity in dating, and then  intimacy in marriage. That simple equation would have saved me and the girls I dated all kinds of grief, heartache, and regret. Your Last First Kiss Most of us date because we want intimacy. We want to feel close to someone. We want to be known deeply and loved deeply. We want sex. We want to share life with someone of the opposite sex who will be involved and invested in what weâre doing and what we care about. With the right heart, and in the right measure, and at the right time, these are all good desires. God made many of us to want these things, and therefore wants us to want these things â with the right heart, in the right measure, and at the right time. Think about your last first kiss in a relationship (if youâve already kissed someone). Why did you do it? You knew you were risking something, that this wasnât the safest way to give yourself to someone. What was driving you most in those brief moments before you let your lips touch? For me, every first kiss was driven more by my own desires than by Godâs desires for me. Every first kiss until I kissed my wife for the first time, seconds after asking her to be my wife. Before Faye, I had let what I wanted outweigh what I knew God wanted, and what I knew was best for the girl I was dating. I craved intimacy, and I knew I would find it in marriage. So, I punched âmarriageâ into Google Maps, jumped on the highway, and ignored the speed limits. Instead of waiting to get to my destination to enjoy emotional and physical intimacy, I pulled over and bought something quicker and cheaper on the side of the road. Intimacy â romantic or otherwise â is a beautiful and precious gift God has given to his children. But like so many of Godâs good gifts, because of our sin, intimacy can be dangerous. The human heart is wired to want intimacy, but it is also wired to corrupt intimacy â to demand intimacy in the wrong ways or at the wrong time, and to expect the wrong things from intimacy. That means intimacy between sinners is dangerous, because weâre prone, by nature, to hurt one another â to do what feels good, instead of caring for the other person; to promise too much too soon, instead of being patient and slow to speak; to put our hope, identity, and worth in one another, instead of in God. Intimacy makes us vulnerable, and sin makes us dangerous. The two together, without covenant promises, can be a formula for disaster in dating. Different Prizes in Marriage and Dating God is the greatest prize in life for any believer â at whatever age, in whatever stage of life, and whatever our relationship status. But is there a unique prize for the believer in marriage? Yes, it is Christ-centered emotional and sexual intimacy with another believer. Before God, within the covenant of marriage, two lives, two hearts, two bodies become one . A husband and wife experience everything in life as one  new person. âCoupleâ doesnât describe them well enough anymore. Yes, theyâre each still themselves, but theyâre too close now to ever be separated again (Mark 10:9). God has made them one. Their things are not their own. Their time is not their own. Even their bodies are not their own (1 Corinthians 7:4). They share all and enjoy all together  now. Sex is the intense experience and picture of their new union, but itâs only a small slice of all the intimacy they enjoy together now. Safety for Intimacy The reason that kind of intimacy is the prize of marriage and not  of our not-yet-married relationships is because that kind of intimacy is never safe anywhere outside of the lifelong covenant called marriage. Never . There are lots of contexts in which romantic intimacy feels  safe outside of marriage, but it never is. There is too much at stake with our hearts, and too many risks involved, without a ring and public vows. Without promises before God, the further we walk into intimacy with another person, the further we expose ourselves to the possibility of being abandoned, betrayed, and crushed. In a Christ-centered marriage , those same risks do not exist. We are together â in sickness and health, in peace and conflict, in disappointment, tragedy, and even failure â until death do us part. When God unites us, death is the only thing strong enough to separate us. That means intimacy is a safe and appropriate experience in marriage . For sure, marriage is not perfectly safe. Married people are still sinners, capable of hurting one another, even to the point of abuse or divorce. But faithful married people are not leaving people. Just like God is not a leaving God. Datingâs Great Prize While the great prize in marriage  is Christ-centered intimacy, the great prize in dating  is Christ-centered clarity. Intimacy is safest in the context of marriage, and marriage is safest in the context of clarity. If we want to have and enjoy Christ-centered intimacy, we need to get married. And if we want to get married, we need to pursue clarity about whom to marry. We donât pursue clarity by diving into intimacy. The right kind of clarity is a means to the right kind of intimacy, not the other way around. Careful, prayerful, thoughtful clarity will produce healthy, lasting, passionate intimacy. Any other road to intimacy will sabotage it, leaving it shallow, fragile, and unreliable. Much of the heartache and confusion we feel in dating stems from treating dating as practice for marriage (clarity through  intimacy), instead of as discernment toward marriage (clarity now, intimacy later). In dating, we often experiment with intimacy until it basically feels like marriage, and then we get married. The risks may seem worth it (even necessary) because of how much we want to be married (or at least everything that comes with being married). But in reality, the risks are not worth it, and theyâre certainly not necessary. God did not mean for us to risk so much in our pursuit of marriage. For sure, we always make ourselves vulnerable to some degree as we get to know someone and develop a relationship, but God wants us to enjoy the fullness of intimacy within a covenant, not in some science lab of love. In Christian dating, weâre not trying marriage on for size, but trying to find someone to marry. Questions We Ask Pursue clarity, and postpone intimacy. What does that look like practically? One test for whether you are pursuing clarity or intimacy is to study the questions we ask in dating. We ask different questions when weâre pursuing clarity more than intimacy. How far can we go? How late should we hang out? What kind of touching is allowed? Is he Christian enough for me to date him? Versus: Does he love Jesus more than he loves me? Does she follow through on her promises? Do I see him showing self-control, or compromising to get what he wants? Is she willing to lovingly tell me when Iâm wrong? Healthy relationships may still need to ask questions in the first set, but theyâll be way down the list. When weâre after intimacy without clarity, we ask the first set and often overlook or minimize the second. But when weâre pursuing clarity, weâll start asking new questions. Here are some examples of questions you could ask in your pursuit of clarity: What have you learned about each other lately â stories, habits, character traits? How have you each grown in your relationship with Jesus since you started dating? Are you both committed to abstaining from any form of sexual immorality? What flags, if any, have others raised about your relationship? What obstacles are keeping the two of you from getting married? Are you each being driven by your own desires, or by Godâs desires for you? In what ways is your relationship different from non-Christian relationships? Questions like these â and countless more like them â uncover what we really want in dating, and where weâre likely to leave Jesus behind. Theyâre the bumpers that keep us out of the gutter, guarding us from impatience and impurity. But theyâre also instruments of true love â the well-made parts that keep our car on the highway to marriage. They keep us focused on where we are headed and what really matters. Theyâre the agents of clarity.
