The Meaning Of Marriage: A Couple’s Devotional Order Printed Copy

Author: Timothy Keller, Kathy
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About the Book

"The Meaning of Marriage: A Couple’s Devotional" by Timothy Keller and Kathy Keller is a guidebook designed to help couples build a strong and lasting relationship based on Christian principles. This devotional provides daily readings, scriptures, and reflections to help couples deepen their understanding of marriage and strengthen their bond with each other. Through practical advice and spiritual guidance, the Kellers aim to help couples create a loving and lasting union.

Charles Finney

Childhood and Teen years Charles Grandison Finney was born the year after Wesley died on 29th August, 1792 in Warren, Connecticut. In 1794 his family moved to New York state, eventually settling at Henderson, near Lake Ontario. Although he received only a brief formal education he decided to study law and joined the practice of a local lawyer, Benjamin Wright. He was also very musical, played the cello and directed the choir at the local Presbyterian Church pastured by Rev. George Gale. His conversion His conversion on October 10th 1821 reads like something out of the book of Acts. Smitten with conviction from Bible reading he decided to ‘settle the question of my soul’s salvation at once, that if it were possible, I would make my peace with God.’ (Autobiography) This conviction increased to an unbearable level over the next couple of days and came to an head when he was suddenly confronted with an ‘inward voice.’ He was inwardly questioned about his spiritual condition and finally received revelation about the finished work of Christ and his own need to give up his sins and submit to Christ’s righteousness. As he sought God in a nearby wood he was overwhelmed with an acute sense of his own wickedness and pride but finally submitted his life to Christ. Back at work that afternoon he was filled with a profound sense of tenderness, sweetness and peace. When work was over and he bade his employer goodnight, he then experienced a mighty baptism in the Holy Spirit, which was recorded as vividly as the day he experienced it, though it was penned some fifty years later. The next morning Finney announced to a customer that he was leaving his law studies to become a preacher of the Gospel. Charles Finney licensed to preach He was licensed to preach in 1823 and ordained as an evangelist in 1824. His penetrating preaching was quite different from many local ministers and included an obvious attempt to break away from the traditional and, as he saw it, dead, orthodox Calvinism. He married to Lydia Andrews in October 1824 and was also joined by Daniel Nash (1774-1831), known popularly as ‘Father Nash.’ Undoubtedly Nash’s special ministry of prayer played a great part in Finney’s growing success as an evangelist. Things really took off when he preached in his old church, where Rev. Gale still ministered. Numerous converts and critics followed! Similar results were experienced in nearby towns of Rome and Utica. Soon newspapers were reporting his campaigns and he began drawing large crowds with dramatic responses. Soon he was preaching in the largest cities of the north with phenomenal results. Campaign after campaign secured thousands of converts. The high point of Finney’s revival career was reached at Rochester, New York, during his 1830-1 meetings. Shopkeepers closed their businesses and the whole city seemed to centre on the revivalist. Responding to his irresistible logic and passionate arguments many of his converts were lawyers, merchants and those from a higher income and professional status. His Preaching Finney openly preached a modified Calvinism, influenced with his own theology of conversion and used what were perceived to be ‘revivalistic techniques.’ These ‘means’ included the use of the anxious bench (a special place for those under conviction), protracted meetings, women allowed to pray in mixed meetings, publicly naming those present resisting God in meetings and the hurried admission of new converts into church membership. Opponents viewed his preaching of the law as ‘scare tactics’ and his persuasive appeals for sinners to come to Christ for salvation were seen as over-emphasising the responsibility of men and ignoring the sovereignty of God. His theology and practise soon became known as the ‘New Measures’ and attracted many opponents from the Old School Presbyterians led by Asahel Nettleton (himself no stranger to true revival and , the revivalistic Congregationalists headed by Lyman Beecher. Pastor at Chatham Street Chapel Finney accepted an appointment as pastor of Chatham Street Chapel in New York City in 1832 where he remained until 1837. It was during this time that he delivered a series of sermons published in 1835 as ‘Lectures on Revivals of Religion.’ Here he clearly stated his views regarding revivals being products of the correct use of human means. Such was the controversy that he left the Presbyterian denomination and joined the Congregationalists in 1836. Oberlin College The next year he became professor of theology at Oberlin College (Ohio) where he taught until his death. He was President here from 1851 until 1866, but still continued regular revival meetings in urban settings (twice in England, 1848, 1851) until 1860. During his stay at Oberlin he produced his, Lectures to Professing Christians (1836), Sermons on Important Subjects (1839) and his famous Memoirs. The Father of Modern Revivalism There is no doubt that Charles Grandison Finney well-deserves the title ‘The Father of Modern Revivalism.’ He was an evangelistic pioneer whose model was followed by a long line of revivalists from D. L. Moody to Billy Graham. His writing have made a massive impact on the entire evangelical world and particularly the ‘Lectures on Revivals’ which has, arguably, ignited more fires of revival than any other single piece literature in evangelical history. This ‘Prince of Revivalists’ passed away peacefully at Oberlin on Sunday, 16th August, 1875 aged almost 83 years. Bibliography: I Will Pour Out My Spirit, R. E. Davies, 1997; Ed: A. Scott Moreau, Baker Evangelical Dictionary of World Missions, 2000; Dictionary of Evangelical Biography 1730-1860, Vol. 1, 1995. Tony Cauchi

your letter to your future spouse

I vividly remember the first time I saw the movie Titanic . The passionate love between Jack and Rose awakened something fierce in my little preteen heart. I thought little of marriage before that movie. Now it consumed my thoughts and dreams. For my friends and me, riding off into the sunset with our respective Jack Dawsons became the ultimate goal in life. We quickly believed the lie that a committed, romantic relationship was all we needed to be okay. Marriage became a savior. As Rose said at the end of the movie, “There was a man named Jack Dawson, and he saved me — in every way a person can be saved.” Though Titanic is now twenty years old, the same romance-as-savior theme is still present in our culture. But surprisingly, many churches don’t reject this lie. They Christianize it. Marriage Idolatry Youth leaders, aware of their teens’ lust for romance and sexual intimacy, are eager to steer students away from poor decisions, and rightly so. But instead of pointing to a present Christ as the promised prize in the fight against lust, far too many point to a future spouse. This strategy may succeed in preserving the virginity of young Christian teens, but the “think about your future spouse” approach misses the heart of the Bible’s message that Jesus alone can satisfy. One specific manifestation of this is the practice of writing notes to a future spouse. There are dozens of Christian articles on how and why to write to a future husband or wife. Though many people believe in this practice and encourage it, it keeps our focus in the wrong place. It subtly (or overtly) puts our hope for happiness in someone other than Christ. Undoubtedly, marriage is a treasured gift many Christians will receive. Instituted by God before the fall, and intended to showcase the beauty of the gospel, marriage ought to be highly regarded by God’s people. But marriage is no savior. It cannot rescue, redeem, or ultimately fulfill us. It has no final power to save us from our loneliness, emptiness, or purposelessness. Believing marriage can do the work of God himself is to serve an idol. So, in the interests of putting marriage in its proper place, here are four reasons to set your hope in a present Christ rather than a future husband or wife. 1. God doesn’t promise marriage. God gives many promises for those in Christ, but none of them includes a spouse. Yes, marriage is a wonderful gift and one worth praying for, but God doesn’t guarantee we will marry. Even for those who are given this gift, it is not promised for a lifetime, as many young widows can attest. This is a shocking reality to many, likely due to a misapplication of Psalm 37:4, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” “If I desire marriage,” we reason, “God said I need only delight myself in him, and he will grant it!” But God does not specify how and when he will grant those desires. For example, other desires often sit underneath the desire for marriage — desires for intimacy, belonging, wholeness, and companionship. But these are all desires God promises to meet in himself, whether we get married or not. He does not need marriage to satisfy the ache in our hearts; he only needs himself. God will give us the desires of our hearts — but in such a way that we’re singing praises to Jesus, not to a spouse. Don’t hope in a promise that God has not given. Instead, put your hope somewhere secure: on the rock of Christ. 2. Marriage can’t handle the pressure. Channeling all of our longings into marriage will crush it. No one person can handle the weight of our desires. The idea of a perfect mate can haunt us when we’re living side by side with another sinner. When we write romantic and idealistic letters to a future husband or wife, we set our hearts in the wrong place and build unrealistic expectations. The more we pour into the letters, the further our future husband or wife will fall short of our standards. Despairing disillusionment is common in Christian marriages likely because the partners have put too much hope in the marriage itself. Marriage is a terrible savior. But if we keep Jesus as our source of hope and joy, he will sustain us through every change in our relational status, and all the ups and downs of married life. 3. Singleness is not a subpar alternative. Eagerly hoping in a future spouse can be a way to avoid the sting of prolonged, unwanted singleness. But God doesn’t see singleness as a curse — he sees it as a gift! The Bible calls singleness the greater alternative, one that promotes undistracted devotion to Jesus (1 Corinthians 7:32–35). Although it’s true that most people will marry, that doesn’t prove that marriage satisfies. There are just as many unhappy married people as there are unhappy single people. Both groups face the same daily battle: Will I fight to find my joy in Jesus today? The longing for marriage does expose one truth: eternal life is found in intimacy, in knowing and being known. But the intimacy we were made for is not intimacy with a fellow sinner, but intimacy with God through Jesus: “This is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent” (John 17:3). 4. God is supremely valuable. Banking our joy on a future spouse assumes we cannot be satisfied and whole without marriage. But marriage is not the grand prize of life — God is. He is the treasure in the field worth selling all we have to own. In Christ, our access to intimacy with God is certain. To know God through Christ is to find abundant life. Though it may be hard to believe on the days our prayers seem to bounce off the ceiling, the Psalms witness to this reality all over: “Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you” (Psalm 73:25). “A day in your courts is better than a thousand elsewhere” (Psalm 84:10). “In your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore” (Psalm 16:11). Though we cannot see, touch, and hear God like we can a fellow human, he is more real and more enjoyable than human intimacy ever can be. Draw near to him and he will draw near to you (James 4:8)! Take the energy you might put toward meditating on a future spouse and instead meditate on God, who has revealed himself to us in the pages of the Bible. The Marriage We Are Promised The end of Titanic pictures a heavenly reunion of all those who died in the 1912 tragedy. A youthful Rose walks through the crowd and approaches her one true love, the one who saved her. Finally, she is united with Jack. Forever and ever, amen. Christian, do you recognize this narrative? It is a shadow of the happy ending awaiting us. One day, we will be reunited with believing friends and family members, and we will finally see our One True Love face-to-face, the One who saved us in every way a person can be saved. But it will not be our spouse, but Jesus. His love saves us, satisfies us, and sustains us. Married or single, he alone should be the central figure in our lives. Don’t lay the weight of your desires, hopes, and dreams on an earthly marriage, but on Christ. Only his love is strong enough to sustain you.