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Jackie Hill Perry
Jackie Hill Perry has a way with words, and people canât stop listening. A gifted poet, rapper, writer, and teacher, she has written books and Bible studies, released hip-hop albums, and taught at events, conferences, colleges, and coliseums all over the nation. Inspired by her powerful testimony of salvation and deliverance from a gay lifestyle and her teaching on the holiness of God, the word is out: God is good, He is Lord, and those who surrender to Him are made new.
The Power of God
Itâs a message Jackie is passionate about because she knows firsthand the transformational power of Jesus Christ. She and her husband â fellow spoken-word artist, Preston Perry â met in 2009 while performing at an artistâs showcase. Impressed with Jackieâs poetry, Preston struck up a friendship that deepened over the years. Eventually, they began dating, which presented significant challenges but also great rewards. The Lord used Preston as a source of healing, and marriage forced Jackie to deal with hurts and fears sheâd been reluctant to give to God. The couple, who reside in Atlanta, married in 2014. They are now the parents of three daughters: Eden, Autumn, and Sage; and are expecting a son.
A decade ago, Jackie could never have imagined marriage, motherhood, and ministry in her future. Violated and abandoned by men who should have loved and protected her, Jackie was hurting. Fear and distrust kept watch over her heart. Surrender wasnât an option, even when a loving God promised her new life. Despite some exposure to church and to Scripture, Jackie was adamant that she would never submit to Jesus as Lord.
Her attraction to women started in early childhood and intensified during adolescence. Jackie finally gave in to same-sex desires, along with drugs and other habits that brought comfort, pleasure, and an emotional escape. Suppressing her femininity by wearing menâs clothing and assuming the male role in dating relationships, Jackie says every area of her life was characterized by sin and rebellion against God.
Then one evening, 19-year-old Jackie felt the conviction of the Holy Spirit. Recalling the experience, she says, âIt was a God thing. No one can ever tell me that I saved myself. I had some understanding of Jesus and obedience and Christianity. But I sincerely wanted nothing to do with God on His terms.â
Even as she resisted, Jackie clearly sensed the Lord speaking to her. âWhen He showed me that all of my sin would be the death of me â that it was true that the wages of sin is death, but it was equally true that God offered eternal life if I would repent and believe â I was compelled to trust Him. For the first time in my life, I knew that God was real and He was worth it. Just the day before, my heart was hard as a rock, and now I wanted Jesus. Only the Holy Spirit could have done that.â
âFor the first time in my life, I knew that God was real and He was worth it. Just the day before, my heart was hard as a rock, and now I wanted Jesus. Only the Holy Spirit could have done that.â
The Power of Words
Jackie dove into Godâs Word and began discovering the woman He designed her to be â mind, body, and spirit. Seeking to express herself in deeper, more artistic ways, she began writing poetry. Jackie didnât shy away from revealing her past or the ongoing struggle with temptation and sin. Her poems unflinchingly spoke gospel truth and glorified God as the ultimate source of love and life. After connecting with the Passion for Christ Movement (P4CM), Jackie was asked to write a poem about being an ex-lesbian. Hesitant at first, she felt the Lord prompting her to move forward. Through its confessional lyrics and rock-solid theology, My Life as a Stud shined a spotlight on Jackieâs conversion and marked the beginning of her public ministry.
âWhen My Life As a Stud came out in 2009, so many gay and lesbian people who didnât go to church, didnât trust Christians, and didnât want to have anything to do with the Bible clicked on the poem and suddenly wanted Jesus. I realized God had given me this art form where Iâm able to speak to peopleâs hearts.â
Since then, she has taken the message of Godâs love to artist showcases, faith-based conferences, college campuses, and major media outlets. The foundation of her message is always the Word of God: In His goodness, God created male and female. As the perfect designer of gender and sexuality, God is worthy of trust and obedience. Although same-sex attraction is central to her testimony, Jackie emphasizes that the church should approach the LGBTQ community the same way it approaches other people. Everyone is created to be an image-bearer of the living God with a unique identity and great worth. Rather than labeling someone as âa gay friend,â itâs important to develop genuine, one-on-one relationships the same way Jesus did. By investing in authentic friendships, Christians will be able to share the gospel because theyâre actually modeling it.
The Power of Redemption
Jackie points out that being âdead in sinâ goes far beyond someoneâs sexual preference. Without Christ, people are lost in every way. But when Jesus gives new life, He forgives and redeems the whole person. She says, âGod saved me from sin, not just my sexuality. I was an all-around sinful person. In essence, sin was my lord. As much as I loved women in a lustful way, I also loved pornography and drugs, bitterness and unforgiveness.â
Through discipleship, Jackie recognized the holistic nature of Godâs redemption. âIâve learned that pride is one of my greatest struggles, even more so than same-sex attraction,â she explains. âPride manifests itself in so many areas of my life, itâs hard to keep up. God didnât just rescue me from being gay. He saved me from believing Iâm a better lord than He is.â In response to the growing debate over same-sex attraction and the frequent questions she receives when people hear her testimony, Jackie wrote her first book, Gay Girl, Good God, to serve three core groups: people seeking to help and understand those within the LGBTQ community; people within the community who may disagree with some of her conclusions but are still intrigued; and people who are believers, yet have same-sex attraction and are trying to figure out how to love Jesus while dealing with those feelings.
When asked what she hopes the church learns from the book, she says, âI want people to see that how you reach the LGBTQ community is the same way you reach anybody â with the gospel. The gospel is about God. The method shouldnât be any different when youâre speaking to someone who is dealing with gluttony or lying or lust. Itâs all the same. God is Lord, Heâs Master, Heâs King, Heâs able to save. And the problem with sin is always a problem between us and God.â
"God is Lord, Heâs Master, Heâs King, Heâs able to save. And the problem with sin is always a problem between us and God."
The Power of Community
Jackie hopes the church will develop greater empathy for same-sex individuals and recognize how difficult it is to walk away from the gay lifestyle. She says, âItâs not a random sin that is easily put off. The feelings are real, and it takes time and work and a long process of dying to self.â Without a supportive church family to encourage and affirm her, the author might have fallen away. The first couple of years as a Christian were the hardest. Jackie had to learn to put off the old nature and put on Christ. The process required spiritual and physical discipline. She had to shop for womenâs clothing, an experience that made her feel strange, vulnerable, and afraid.
Temptation was a constant source of condemnation, at times pushing Jackie into depression and doubt as she grieved over her sinful nature. After a decade of growing in Christ, Jackie still faces temptations but says theyâre more subtle and easier to flee. Instead of looking at women as objects of lust, she chooses to see them as image-bearers of God. In evaluating her walk with the Lord, she considers whether she is loving people well, growing in holiness, and bearing good fruit. And she looks to Jesus, who endured the horror of the cross because He loved God with all of His heart. Knowing Jesus didnât want the cup of suffering, yet accepted it with humility, helps Jackie run the Christian race with endurance.
Endurance and spiritual growth became the inspiration for Jackieâs second album, Crescendo, which was hailed as âstunning,â âflawless,â and arguably âthe best hip-hop album of the year.â Although she began experimenting with rap simply for creative expression, Jackie soon saw it as another platform to share the gospel. When asked about the albumâs title, the talented artist says, âIn music theory, âcrescendoâ means the increase in sound. So I wanted to apply that to faith. When youâre in Christ, as your faith increases, your fruit should get louder. You love more, youâre more generous, more attentive to the needs of people. You listen well. Things begin to change as your faith becomes more evident.â
She wrote the album to mimic that spiritual progression. The first track begins on a low note with âLamentations,â a rap about the reality of sin and the tendency for Jackie to forget sheâs been forgiven. Taking listeners through an honest exploration of spiritual growth, Crescendo ends on a high note, celebrating how the Lord saved Jackie through His gospel, initiated her Christian walk, and sustains her to this day.
The Power of Legacy
A gifted communicator and lyricist, Jackie isnât just impacting culture with wordcraft. Sheâs also building a spiritual legacy for her children. Because of her childhood trauma, the idea of raising daughters was terrifying. But sheâs found so much joy in becoming a mom. Jackie says, âWhen I think of parenthood, I know Iâm only called to steward these children and disciple them and hope they will love the Lord with all their hearts, souls, minds, and strength. When I was carrying Eden, Titus 2 really spoke to me about the older women teaching the younger women.
"Once I realized what a privilege it would be to raise up a woman in my home, I welcomed the challenge.â As Jackie reflects on the last decade, she gives God all the glory and praise. Without Christ, she wouldnât have her precious daughters, would have missed out on beautiful friendships, and would never have experienced being loved by a man for the first time in her life. âIf God hadnât rescued me, none of this would be possible,â Jackie says. âLife still has its challenges, for sure. But itâs better. Itâs so much better.â
This article courtesy of HomeLife magazine.
the great prize in christian dating - pursue clarity and postpone intimacy
I got lots of things wrong in dating, but as I think back over my mistakes and failures â dating too young, jumping from relationship to relationship, not being honest with myself or with others, failing to set or keep boundaries, not listening to friends and family, not prizing and pursuing purity â one error rises above the others, and in many ways explains the others: My dating relationships were mainly a pursuit of intimacy with a girlfriend, not clarity about whether to marry her. In my best moments, I was pursuing clarity through  intimacy, but in a lot of other moments, if Iâm honest, I just wanted intimacy at whatever cost. âThe pursuit of marriageâ was a warm and justifying pullover to wear over my conscience when things started to go too far physically and emotionally. But even clarity through  intimacy misses the point and gets it backwards. I should have been pursuing clarity in dating, and then  intimacy in marriage. That simple equation would have saved me and the girls I dated all kinds of grief, heartache, and regret. Your Last First Kiss Most of us date because we want intimacy. We want to feel close to someone. We want to be known deeply and loved deeply. We want sex. We want to share life with someone of the opposite sex who will be involved and invested in what weâre doing and what we care about. With the right heart, and in the right measure, and at the right time, these are all good desires. God made many of us to want these things, and therefore wants us to want these things â with the right heart, in the right measure, and at the right time. Think about your last first kiss in a relationship (if youâve already kissed someone). Why did you do it? You knew you were risking something, that this wasnât the safest way to give yourself to someone. What was driving you most in those brief moments before you let your lips touch? For me, every first kiss was driven more by my own desires than by Godâs desires for me. Every first kiss until I kissed my wife for the first time, seconds after asking her to be my wife. Before Faye, I had let what I wanted outweigh what I knew God wanted, and what I knew was best for the girl I was dating. I craved intimacy, and I knew I would find it in marriage. So, I punched âmarriageâ into Google Maps, jumped on the highway, and ignored the speed limits. Instead of waiting to get to my destination to enjoy emotional and physical intimacy, I pulled over and bought something quicker and cheaper on the side of the road. Intimacy â romantic or otherwise â is a beautiful and precious gift God has given to his children. But like so many of Godâs good gifts, because of our sin, intimacy can be dangerous. The human heart is wired to want intimacy, but it is also wired to corrupt intimacy â to demand intimacy in the wrong ways or at the wrong time, and to expect the wrong things from intimacy. That means intimacy between sinners is dangerous, because weâre prone, by nature, to hurt one another â to do what feels good, instead of caring for the other person; to promise too much too soon, instead of being patient and slow to speak; to put our hope, identity, and worth in one another, instead of in God. Intimacy makes us vulnerable, and sin makes us dangerous. The two together, without covenant promises, can be a formula for disaster in dating. Different Prizes in Marriage and Dating God is the greatest prize in life for any believer â at whatever age, in whatever stage of life, and whatever our relationship status. But is there a unique prize for the believer in marriage? Yes, it is Christ-centered emotional and sexual intimacy with another believer. Before God, within the covenant of marriage, two lives, two hearts, two bodies become one . A husband and wife experience everything in life as one  new person. âCoupleâ doesnât describe them well enough anymore. Yes, theyâre each still themselves, but theyâre too close now to ever be separated again (Mark 10:9). God has made them one. Their things are not their own. Their time is not their own. Even their bodies are not their own (1 Corinthians 7:4). They share all and enjoy all together  now. Sex is the intense experience and picture of their new union, but itâs only a small slice of all the intimacy they enjoy together now. Safety for Intimacy The reason that kind of intimacy is the prize of marriage and not  of our not-yet-married relationships is because that kind of intimacy is never safe anywhere outside of the lifelong covenant called marriage. Never . There are lots of contexts in which romantic intimacy feels  safe outside of marriage, but it never is. There is too much at stake with our hearts, and too many risks involved, without a ring and public vows. Without promises before God, the further we walk into intimacy with another person, the further we expose ourselves to the possibility of being abandoned, betrayed, and crushed. In a Christ-centered marriage , those same risks do not exist. We are together â in sickness and health, in peace and conflict, in disappointment, tragedy, and even failure â until death do us part. When God unites us, death is the only thing strong enough to separate us. That means intimacy is a safe and appropriate experience in marriage . For sure, marriage is not perfectly safe. Married people are still sinners, capable of hurting one another, even to the point of abuse or divorce. But faithful married people are not leaving people. Just like God is not a leaving God. Datingâs Great Prize While the great prize in marriage  is Christ-centered intimacy, the great prize in dating  is Christ-centered clarity. Intimacy is safest in the context of marriage, and marriage is safest in the context of clarity. If we want to have and enjoy Christ-centered intimacy, we need to get married. And if we want to get married, we need to pursue clarity about whom to marry. We donât pursue clarity by diving into intimacy. The right kind of clarity is a means to the right kind of intimacy, not the other way around. Careful, prayerful, thoughtful clarity will produce healthy, lasting, passionate intimacy. Any other road to intimacy will sabotage it, leaving it shallow, fragile, and unreliable. Much of the heartache and confusion we feel in dating stems from treating dating as practice for marriage (clarity through  intimacy), instead of as discernment toward marriage (clarity now, intimacy later). In dating, we often experiment with intimacy until it basically feels like marriage, and then we get married. The risks may seem worth it (even necessary) because of how much we want to be married (or at least everything that comes with being married). But in reality, the risks are not worth it, and theyâre certainly not necessary. God did not mean for us to risk so much in our pursuit of marriage. For sure, we always make ourselves vulnerable to some degree as we get to know someone and develop a relationship, but God wants us to enjoy the fullness of intimacy within a covenant, not in some science lab of love. In Christian dating, weâre not trying marriage on for size, but trying to find someone to marry. Questions We Ask Pursue clarity, and postpone intimacy. What does that look like practically? One test for whether you are pursuing clarity or intimacy is to study the questions we ask in dating. We ask different questions when weâre pursuing clarity more than intimacy. How far can we go? How late should we hang out? What kind of touching is allowed? Is he Christian enough for me to date him? Versus: Does he love Jesus more than he loves me? Does she follow through on her promises? Do I see him showing self-control, or compromising to get what he wants? Is she willing to lovingly tell me when Iâm wrong? Healthy relationships may still need to ask questions in the first set, but theyâll be way down the list. When weâre after intimacy without clarity, we ask the first set and often overlook or minimize the second. But when weâre pursuing clarity, weâll start asking new questions. Here are some examples of questions you could ask in your pursuit of clarity: What have you learned about each other lately â stories, habits, character traits? How have you each grown in your relationship with Jesus since you started dating? Are you both committed to abstaining from any form of sexual immorality? What flags, if any, have others raised about your relationship? What obstacles are keeping the two of you from getting married? Are you each being driven by your own desires, or by Godâs desires for you? In what ways is your relationship different from non-Christian relationships? Questions like these â and countless more like them â uncover what we really want in dating, and where weâre likely to leave Jesus behind. Theyâre the bumpers that keep us out of the gutter, guarding us from impatience and impurity. But theyâre also instruments of true love â the well-made parts that keep our car on the highway to marriage. They keep us focused on where we are headed and what really matters. Theyâre the agents of clarity.