The Judas Goat: How To Deal With False Friendships, Betrayals, And The Temptation Not To Forgive Order Printed Copy
- Author: Perry Stone
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About the Book
"The Judas Goat" by Perry Stone explores the challenges and complexities of navigating false friendships, betrayals, and the temptation to withhold forgiveness. Stone offers insight and practical advice on how to identify toxic relationships, set boundaries, and ultimately find healing and restoration in the midst of betrayal. Through biblical teachings and personal anecdotes, Stone provides readers with tools to overcome the pain and devastation caused by betrayal and choose forgiveness as a path to freedom and peace.
Jackie Hill Perry
Jackie Hill Perry has a way with words, and people canât stop listening. A gifted poet, rapper, writer, and teacher, she has written books and Bible studies, released hip-hop albums, and taught at events, conferences, colleges, and coliseums all over the nation. Inspired by her powerful testimony of salvation and deliverance from a gay lifestyle and her teaching on the holiness of God, the word is out: God is good, He is Lord, and those who surrender to Him are made new.
The Power of God
Itâs a message Jackie is passionate about because she knows firsthand the transformational power of Jesus Christ. She and her husband â fellow spoken-word artist, Preston Perry â met in 2009 while performing at an artistâs showcase. Impressed with Jackieâs poetry, Preston struck up a friendship that deepened over the years. Eventually, they began dating, which presented significant challenges but also great rewards. The Lord used Preston as a source of healing, and marriage forced Jackie to deal with hurts and fears sheâd been reluctant to give to God. The couple, who reside in Atlanta, married in 2014. They are now the parents of three daughters: Eden, Autumn, and Sage; and are expecting a son.
A decade ago, Jackie could never have imagined marriage, motherhood, and ministry in her future. Violated and abandoned by men who should have loved and protected her, Jackie was hurting. Fear and distrust kept watch over her heart. Surrender wasnât an option, even when a loving God promised her new life. Despite some exposure to church and to Scripture, Jackie was adamant that she would never submit to Jesus as Lord.
Her attraction to women started in early childhood and intensified during adolescence. Jackie finally gave in to same-sex desires, along with drugs and other habits that brought comfort, pleasure, and an emotional escape. Suppressing her femininity by wearing menâs clothing and assuming the male role in dating relationships, Jackie says every area of her life was characterized by sin and rebellion against God.
Then one evening, 19-year-old Jackie felt the conviction of the Holy Spirit. Recalling the experience, she says, âIt was a God thing. No one can ever tell me that I saved myself. I had some understanding of Jesus and obedience and Christianity. But I sincerely wanted nothing to do with God on His terms.â
Even as she resisted, Jackie clearly sensed the Lord speaking to her. âWhen He showed me that all of my sin would be the death of me â that it was true that the wages of sin is death, but it was equally true that God offered eternal life if I would repent and believe â I was compelled to trust Him. For the first time in my life, I knew that God was real and He was worth it. Just the day before, my heart was hard as a rock, and now I wanted Jesus. Only the Holy Spirit could have done that.â
âFor the first time in my life, I knew that God was real and He was worth it. Just the day before, my heart was hard as a rock, and now I wanted Jesus. Only the Holy Spirit could have done that.â
The Power of Words
Jackie dove into Godâs Word and began discovering the woman He designed her to be â mind, body, and spirit. Seeking to express herself in deeper, more artistic ways, she began writing poetry. Jackie didnât shy away from revealing her past or the ongoing struggle with temptation and sin. Her poems unflinchingly spoke gospel truth and glorified God as the ultimate source of love and life. After connecting with the Passion for Christ Movement (P4CM), Jackie was asked to write a poem about being an ex-lesbian. Hesitant at first, she felt the Lord prompting her to move forward. Through its confessional lyrics and rock-solid theology, My Life as a Stud shined a spotlight on Jackieâs conversion and marked the beginning of her public ministry.
âWhen My Life As a Stud came out in 2009, so many gay and lesbian people who didnât go to church, didnât trust Christians, and didnât want to have anything to do with the Bible clicked on the poem and suddenly wanted Jesus. I realized God had given me this art form where Iâm able to speak to peopleâs hearts.â
Since then, she has taken the message of Godâs love to artist showcases, faith-based conferences, college campuses, and major media outlets. The foundation of her message is always the Word of God: In His goodness, God created male and female. As the perfect designer of gender and sexuality, God is worthy of trust and obedience. Although same-sex attraction is central to her testimony, Jackie emphasizes that the church should approach the LGBTQ community the same way it approaches other people. Everyone is created to be an image-bearer of the living God with a unique identity and great worth. Rather than labeling someone as âa gay friend,â itâs important to develop genuine, one-on-one relationships the same way Jesus did. By investing in authentic friendships, Christians will be able to share the gospel because theyâre actually modeling it.
The Power of Redemption
Jackie points out that being âdead in sinâ goes far beyond someoneâs sexual preference. Without Christ, people are lost in every way. But when Jesus gives new life, He forgives and redeems the whole person. She says, âGod saved me from sin, not just my sexuality. I was an all-around sinful person. In essence, sin was my lord. As much as I loved women in a lustful way, I also loved pornography and drugs, bitterness and unforgiveness.â
Through discipleship, Jackie recognized the holistic nature of Godâs redemption. âIâve learned that pride is one of my greatest struggles, even more so than same-sex attraction,â she explains. âPride manifests itself in so many areas of my life, itâs hard to keep up. God didnât just rescue me from being gay. He saved me from believing Iâm a better lord than He is.â In response to the growing debate over same-sex attraction and the frequent questions she receives when people hear her testimony, Jackie wrote her first book, Gay Girl, Good God, to serve three core groups: people seeking to help and understand those within the LGBTQ community; people within the community who may disagree with some of her conclusions but are still intrigued; and people who are believers, yet have same-sex attraction and are trying to figure out how to love Jesus while dealing with those feelings.
When asked what she hopes the church learns from the book, she says, âI want people to see that how you reach the LGBTQ community is the same way you reach anybody â with the gospel. The gospel is about God. The method shouldnât be any different when youâre speaking to someone who is dealing with gluttony or lying or lust. Itâs all the same. God is Lord, Heâs Master, Heâs King, Heâs able to save. And the problem with sin is always a problem between us and God.â
"God is Lord, Heâs Master, Heâs King, Heâs able to save. And the problem with sin is always a problem between us and God."
The Power of Community
Jackie hopes the church will develop greater empathy for same-sex individuals and recognize how difficult it is to walk away from the gay lifestyle. She says, âItâs not a random sin that is easily put off. The feelings are real, and it takes time and work and a long process of dying to self.â Without a supportive church family to encourage and affirm her, the author might have fallen away. The first couple of years as a Christian were the hardest. Jackie had to learn to put off the old nature and put on Christ. The process required spiritual and physical discipline. She had to shop for womenâs clothing, an experience that made her feel strange, vulnerable, and afraid.
Temptation was a constant source of condemnation, at times pushing Jackie into depression and doubt as she grieved over her sinful nature. After a decade of growing in Christ, Jackie still faces temptations but says theyâre more subtle and easier to flee. Instead of looking at women as objects of lust, she chooses to see them as image-bearers of God. In evaluating her walk with the Lord, she considers whether she is loving people well, growing in holiness, and bearing good fruit. And she looks to Jesus, who endured the horror of the cross because He loved God with all of His heart. Knowing Jesus didnât want the cup of suffering, yet accepted it with humility, helps Jackie run the Christian race with endurance.
Endurance and spiritual growth became the inspiration for Jackieâs second album, Crescendo, which was hailed as âstunning,â âflawless,â and arguably âthe best hip-hop album of the year.â Although she began experimenting with rap simply for creative expression, Jackie soon saw it as another platform to share the gospel. When asked about the albumâs title, the talented artist says, âIn music theory, âcrescendoâ means the increase in sound. So I wanted to apply that to faith. When youâre in Christ, as your faith increases, your fruit should get louder. You love more, youâre more generous, more attentive to the needs of people. You listen well. Things begin to change as your faith becomes more evident.â
She wrote the album to mimic that spiritual progression. The first track begins on a low note with âLamentations,â a rap about the reality of sin and the tendency for Jackie to forget sheâs been forgiven. Taking listeners through an honest exploration of spiritual growth, Crescendo ends on a high note, celebrating how the Lord saved Jackie through His gospel, initiated her Christian walk, and sustains her to this day.
The Power of Legacy
A gifted communicator and lyricist, Jackie isnât just impacting culture with wordcraft. Sheâs also building a spiritual legacy for her children. Because of her childhood trauma, the idea of raising daughters was terrifying. But sheâs found so much joy in becoming a mom. Jackie says, âWhen I think of parenthood, I know Iâm only called to steward these children and disciple them and hope they will love the Lord with all their hearts, souls, minds, and strength. When I was carrying Eden, Titus 2 really spoke to me about the older women teaching the younger women.
"Once I realized what a privilege it would be to raise up a woman in my home, I welcomed the challenge.â As Jackie reflects on the last decade, she gives God all the glory and praise. Without Christ, she wouldnât have her precious daughters, would have missed out on beautiful friendships, and would never have experienced being loved by a man for the first time in her life. âIf God hadnât rescued me, none of this would be possible,â Jackie says. âLife still has its challenges, for sure. But itâs better. Itâs so much better.â
This article courtesy of HomeLife magazine.
The Story of John Bunyan's âPilgrim's Progressâ
On the morning of November 12, 1660, a young pastor entered a small meeting house in Lower Samsell, England, preparing to be arrested. He hadnât noticed the men keeping guard outside the house, but he didnât need to. A friend had warned him that they were coming. He came anyway. He had agreed to preach. The constable broke in upon the meeting and began searching the faces until he found the one he came for: a tall man, wearing a reddish mustache and plain clothes, paused in the act of prayer. John Bunyan by name. âHad I been minded to play the coward, I could have escaped,â Bunyan later remembered. But he had no mind for that now. He spoke what closing exhortation he could as the constable forced him from the house, a man with no weapon but his Bible. Two months and several court proceedings later, Bunyan was taken from his church, his family, and his job to serve âone of the longest jail terms . . . by a dissenter in Englandâ (On Reading Well, 182). For twelve years, he would sleep on a straw mat in a cold cell. For twelve years, he would wake up away from his wife and four young children. For twelve years, he would wait for release or, if not, exile or execution. And in those twelve years, he began a book about a pilgrim named Christian â a book that would become, for over two centuries, the best-selling book written in the English language. Tinker Turned Preacher John Bunyan (1628â1688) was not the most likely Englishman to write The Pilgrimâs Progress, a book that would be translated into two hundred languages, that would capture the imaginations of children and scholars alike, and that would rank, in influence and popularity, just behind the King James Bible in the English-speaking world. âBunyan is the first major English writer who was neither London-based nor university-educated,â writes Christopher Hill. Rather, âthe army had been his school, and prison his universityâ (The Life, Books, and Influence of John Bunyan, 168). ââPilgrimâs Progressâ bears the marks of John Bunyanâs confinement. Without the prison, we may not have the pilgrim.â As Paul said of the Corinthians, so we might say of Bunyan: he had few advantages âaccording to worldly standardsâ (1 Corinthians 1:26). In his spiritual autobiography, Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners, he confesses that his fatherâs house was âof that rank that is meanest and most despised of all the families in the landâ (7). Thomas Bunyan was a tinker, a traveling mender of pots, pans, and other metal utensils. Thomas sent his son to school only briefly, where John learned to read and write. Later, after a stint in the army, he followed his father into the tinker trade. Meanwhile, Bunyan recalls, âI had but few equals, especially considering my years, which were tender, being few, both for cursing, swearing, lying, and blaspheming the name of Godâ (Grace Abounding, 8). Sometime in Bunyanâs early twenties, however, God laid his hand on the blasphemous tinker and began to press. For the first time, Bunyan felt the load of sin and guilt on his back, and despair nearly sunk him. He agonized over his soul for years before he was finally able to say, âGreat sins do draw out great grace; and where guilt is most terrible and fierce, there the mercy of God in Christ, when showed to the soul, appears most high and mightyâ (Grace Abounding, 97). Bunyan soon carried this travail and triumph of grace into the pulpit of a Bedford church, where he heralded Christ so powerfully that congregations throughout Bedfordshire County began asking for the tinker turned preacher â including a small gathering of believers in Lower Samsell. Trying Days for Dissenters Not everyone in England responded warmly to Bunyanâs preaching, however. âHe lived in more trying days than those in which our lot is fallen,â wrote John Newton a century later (âPreface to The Pilgrimâs Progress,â xxxix). Yes, these were trying days â at least for dissenting pastors like Bunyan, who refused to join the Church of England. Throughout the seventeenth century, dissenters were sometimes honored, sometimes ignored, and sometimes arrested by Englandâs authorities. Bunyanâs lot fell into the last of these. Some dissenters did not exactly help the cause. A Puritan sect called the Fifth Monarchy Men, for example, took to arms in 1657 and 1661 in order to claim Englandâs crown for the (supposedly) soon-to-return Christ. Often, then, âthe authorities did not seek to suppress Dissenters as heretics but as disturbers of law and order,â David Calhoun explains (Life, Books, and Influence, 28). Bunyan was no radical â simply a tinker who preached without an official license. Still, the Bedfordshire authorities thought it safer to silence him. Once arrested, Bunyan was given an ultimatum: If he would agree to cease preaching and remain quiet in his calling as a tinker, he could return to his family at once. If he refused, imprisonment and potential exile awaited him. At one point in the proceedings (which lasted several weeks), Bunyan responded, If any man can lay anything to my charge, either in doctrine or practice, in this particular, that can be proved error or heresy, I am willing to disown it, even in the very market place; but if it be truth, then to stand to it to the last drop of my blood. (Grace Abounding, 153) Bunyan was then 32 years old. He would not be a free man again until age 44. Bedford Jail Despite Bunyanâs boldness before the magistrates, his decision was not an easy one. Most trying of all was his separation from Elizabeth, his wife, and their four young children, one of whom was blind. Years into his jail time, he would write, âThe parting with my wife and poor children has oft been to me in this place as the pulling the flesh from my bonesâ (Grace Abounding, 122). He would make shoelaces over the next twelve years to help support them. But Bunyan would not ultimately regret his decision. Though parted from the comfort of his family, he was not parted from the comfort of his Master. âJesus Christ . . . was never more real and apparent than now,â the imprisoned Bunyan wrote. âHere I have seen him and felt him indeedâ (Grace Abounding, 119). âThe best designs of the devil can only serve the progress of Godâs pilgrims.â With comfort in his soul, then, Bunyan gave himself to whatever ministry he could. He counseled visitors. He and other inmates preached to each other on Sundays. But most of all, Bunyan wrote. In jail, with his Bible and Foxeâs Book of Martyrs close at hand, he penned Grace Abounding. There also, as he was working on another book, an image of a path and a pilgrim flashed upon his mind. âAnd thus it was,â Bunyan wrote in a poem, I, writing of the way And race of saints, in this our gospel day, Fell suddenly into an allegory, About their journey, and the way to glory. (Pilgrimâs Progress, 3) Thus began the book that would soon be read, not only in Bunyanâs Bedford, but in Sheffield, Birmingham, Manchester, London â and eventually far beyond. The Bedford magistrates sought to silence Bunyan in jail. In jail, Bunyan sounded a trumpet that reached the ears of all the West, and even the world. Calvinism in Delightful Colors The genius of Bunyanâs book, along with its immediate popularity, owes much to the writerâs sudden fall âinto an allegory.â As an allegory, Pilgrimâs Progress operates on two levels. On one level, the book is a storehouse of Puritan theology â âthe Westminster Confession of Faith with people in it,â as someone once said. On another level, however, it is an enthralling adventure story â a journey of life and death from the City of Destruction to the Celestial City. The poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge would later write, âI could not have believed beforehand that Calvinism could be painted in such exquisitely delightful colorsâ (Life, Books, and Influence, 166). Those who read Pilgrimâs Progress find theology coming to them in dungeons and caves, in sword fights and fairs, in honest friends and two-faced flatterers. Bunyan does not merely tell us we must renounce all for Christâs sake; he shows us Christian fleeing his neighbors and family, fingers in his ears, crying, âLife! life! eternal life!â (Pilgrimâs Progress, 14). Bunyan does not simply instruct us about our spiritual conflict; he makes us stand in the Valley of Humiliation with a âfoul fiend . . . hideous to beholdâ striding toward us (66). Bunyan does not just warn us of the subtlety of temptation; he gives us sore feet on a rocky path, and then reveals a smooth road âon the other side of the fenceâ (129) â more comfortable on the feet, but the straightest way to a giant named Despair. The cast of characters in Pilgrimâs Progress reminds us that the path to the Celestial City is narrow â so narrow that only a few find it, while scores fall by the wayside. Here we meet Timorous, who flees backward at the sight of lions; Mr. Hold-the-world, who falls into Demasâs cave; Talkative, whose religion lives only in his tongue; Ignorance, who seeks entrance to the city by his own merits; and a host of others who, for one reason or another, do not endure to the end. âIn jail, John Bunyan sounded a trumpet that reached the ears of all the West, and even the world.â And herein lies the drama of the story. Bunyan, a staunch believer in the doctrine of the saintsâ perseverance, nevertheless refused to take that perseverance for granted. As long as we are on the path, we are ânot yet out of the gun-shot of the devilâ (101). Between here and our home, many enemies lie along the way. Nevertheless, let every pilgrim take courage: âyou have all power in heaven and earth on your sideâ (101). If grace has brought us to the path, grace will guard our every step. âAll We Do Is Succeedâ Within ten years of its publishing date in 1678, Pilgrimâs Progress had gone through eleven editions and made the Bedford tinker a national phenomenon. According to Calhoun, âSome three thousand people came to hear him one Sunday in London, and twelve hundred turned up for a weekday sermon during the winterâ (Life, Books, and Influence, 38). If the Bedford magistrates had allowed Bunyan to continue preaching, we would still remember him today as the author of several dozen books and as one of the many Puritan luminaries. But in all likelihood, he would not be read today in some two hundred languages besides his own. For Pilgrimâs Progress is a work of prison literature â and it bears the marks of Bunyanâs confinement. Without the prison, we would likely not have the pilgrim. The story of Bunyan and his book, then, is yet one more illustration that Godâs ways are high above our own (Isaiah 55:8â9), and that the best designs of the devil can only serve the progress of Godâs pilgrims (Genesis 50:20). John Piper, reflecting on Bunyanâs imprisonment, says, âAll we do is succeed â either painfully or pleasantlyâ (âThe Chief Design of My Lifeâ). Yes, if we have lost our burden at the cross, and now find ourselves on the pilgrimsâ path, all we do is succeed. We succeed whether we feast with the saints in Palace Beautiful or wrestle Apollyon in the Valley of Humiliation. We succeed whether we fellowship with shepherds in the Delectable Mountains or lie bleeding in Vanity Fair. We succeed even when we walk straight into the last river, our feet reaching for the bottom as the water rises above our heads. For at the end of this path is a prince who âis such a lover of poor pilgrims, that the like is not to be found from the east to the westâ (Pilgrimâs Progress, 61). Among the company of that prince is one John Bunyan, a pilgrim who has now joined the cloud of witnesses (Hebrews 12:1). âThough he died, he still speaksâ (Hebrews 11:4) â and urges the rest of us onward. Article by Scott Hubbard