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About the Book
"Searching for the Pattern" by John Mark Hicks explores the idea of restoring the ancient patterns of the early church in modern Christian communities. It discusses the importance of understanding and following the biblical principles and patterns laid out in the New Testament for church structure, worship, and practice. The book emphasizes the need for churches to rediscover these patterns to remain faithful to God's design for the church.
Jackie Hill Perry
Jackie Hill Perry has a way with words, and people canât stop listening. A gifted poet, rapper, writer, and teacher, she has written books and Bible studies, released hip-hop albums, and taught at events, conferences, colleges, and coliseums all over the nation. Inspired by her powerful testimony of salvation and deliverance from a gay lifestyle and her teaching on the holiness of God, the word is out: God is good, He is Lord, and those who surrender to Him are made new.
The Power of God
Itâs a message Jackie is passionate about because she knows firsthand the transformational power of Jesus Christ. She and her husband â fellow spoken-word artist, Preston Perry â met in 2009 while performing at an artistâs showcase. Impressed with Jackieâs poetry, Preston struck up a friendship that deepened over the years. Eventually, they began dating, which presented significant challenges but also great rewards. The Lord used Preston as a source of healing, and marriage forced Jackie to deal with hurts and fears sheâd been reluctant to give to God. The couple, who reside in Atlanta, married in 2014. They are now the parents of three daughters: Eden, Autumn, and Sage; and are expecting a son.
A decade ago, Jackie could never have imagined marriage, motherhood, and ministry in her future. Violated and abandoned by men who should have loved and protected her, Jackie was hurting. Fear and distrust kept watch over her heart. Surrender wasnât an option, even when a loving God promised her new life. Despite some exposure to church and to Scripture, Jackie was adamant that she would never submit to Jesus as Lord.
Her attraction to women started in early childhood and intensified during adolescence. Jackie finally gave in to same-sex desires, along with drugs and other habits that brought comfort, pleasure, and an emotional escape. Suppressing her femininity by wearing menâs clothing and assuming the male role in dating relationships, Jackie says every area of her life was characterized by sin and rebellion against God.
Then one evening, 19-year-old Jackie felt the conviction of the Holy Spirit. Recalling the experience, she says, âIt was a God thing. No one can ever tell me that I saved myself. I had some understanding of Jesus and obedience and Christianity. But I sincerely wanted nothing to do with God on His terms.â
Even as she resisted, Jackie clearly sensed the Lord speaking to her. âWhen He showed me that all of my sin would be the death of me â that it was true that the wages of sin is death, but it was equally true that God offered eternal life if I would repent and believe â I was compelled to trust Him. For the first time in my life, I knew that God was real and He was worth it. Just the day before, my heart was hard as a rock, and now I wanted Jesus. Only the Holy Spirit could have done that.â
âFor the first time in my life, I knew that God was real and He was worth it. Just the day before, my heart was hard as a rock, and now I wanted Jesus. Only the Holy Spirit could have done that.â
The Power of Words
Jackie dove into Godâs Word and began discovering the woman He designed her to be â mind, body, and spirit. Seeking to express herself in deeper, more artistic ways, she began writing poetry. Jackie didnât shy away from revealing her past or the ongoing struggle with temptation and sin. Her poems unflinchingly spoke gospel truth and glorified God as the ultimate source of love and life. After connecting with the Passion for Christ Movement (P4CM), Jackie was asked to write a poem about being an ex-lesbian. Hesitant at first, she felt the Lord prompting her to move forward. Through its confessional lyrics and rock-solid theology, My Life as a Stud shined a spotlight on Jackieâs conversion and marked the beginning of her public ministry.
âWhen My Life As a Stud came out in 2009, so many gay and lesbian people who didnât go to church, didnât trust Christians, and didnât want to have anything to do with the Bible clicked on the poem and suddenly wanted Jesus. I realized God had given me this art form where Iâm able to speak to peopleâs hearts.â
Since then, she has taken the message of Godâs love to artist showcases, faith-based conferences, college campuses, and major media outlets. The foundation of her message is always the Word of God: In His goodness, God created male and female. As the perfect designer of gender and sexuality, God is worthy of trust and obedience. Although same-sex attraction is central to her testimony, Jackie emphasizes that the church should approach the LGBTQ community the same way it approaches other people. Everyone is created to be an image-bearer of the living God with a unique identity and great worth. Rather than labeling someone as âa gay friend,â itâs important to develop genuine, one-on-one relationships the same way Jesus did. By investing in authentic friendships, Christians will be able to share the gospel because theyâre actually modeling it.
The Power of Redemption
Jackie points out that being âdead in sinâ goes far beyond someoneâs sexual preference. Without Christ, people are lost in every way. But when Jesus gives new life, He forgives and redeems the whole person. She says, âGod saved me from sin, not just my sexuality. I was an all-around sinful person. In essence, sin was my lord. As much as I loved women in a lustful way, I also loved pornography and drugs, bitterness and unforgiveness.â
Through discipleship, Jackie recognized the holistic nature of Godâs redemption. âIâve learned that pride is one of my greatest struggles, even more so than same-sex attraction,â she explains. âPride manifests itself in so many areas of my life, itâs hard to keep up. God didnât just rescue me from being gay. He saved me from believing Iâm a better lord than He is.â In response to the growing debate over same-sex attraction and the frequent questions she receives when people hear her testimony, Jackie wrote her first book, Gay Girl, Good God, to serve three core groups: people seeking to help and understand those within the LGBTQ community; people within the community who may disagree with some of her conclusions but are still intrigued; and people who are believers, yet have same-sex attraction and are trying to figure out how to love Jesus while dealing with those feelings.
When asked what she hopes the church learns from the book, she says, âI want people to see that how you reach the LGBTQ community is the same way you reach anybody â with the gospel. The gospel is about God. The method shouldnât be any different when youâre speaking to someone who is dealing with gluttony or lying or lust. Itâs all the same. God is Lord, Heâs Master, Heâs King, Heâs able to save. And the problem with sin is always a problem between us and God.â
"God is Lord, Heâs Master, Heâs King, Heâs able to save. And the problem with sin is always a problem between us and God."
The Power of Community
Jackie hopes the church will develop greater empathy for same-sex individuals and recognize how difficult it is to walk away from the gay lifestyle. She says, âItâs not a random sin that is easily put off. The feelings are real, and it takes time and work and a long process of dying to self.â Without a supportive church family to encourage and affirm her, the author might have fallen away. The first couple of years as a Christian were the hardest. Jackie had to learn to put off the old nature and put on Christ. The process required spiritual and physical discipline. She had to shop for womenâs clothing, an experience that made her feel strange, vulnerable, and afraid.
Temptation was a constant source of condemnation, at times pushing Jackie into depression and doubt as she grieved over her sinful nature. After a decade of growing in Christ, Jackie still faces temptations but says theyâre more subtle and easier to flee. Instead of looking at women as objects of lust, she chooses to see them as image-bearers of God. In evaluating her walk with the Lord, she considers whether she is loving people well, growing in holiness, and bearing good fruit. And she looks to Jesus, who endured the horror of the cross because He loved God with all of His heart. Knowing Jesus didnât want the cup of suffering, yet accepted it with humility, helps Jackie run the Christian race with endurance.
Endurance and spiritual growth became the inspiration for Jackieâs second album, Crescendo, which was hailed as âstunning,â âflawless,â and arguably âthe best hip-hop album of the year.â Although she began experimenting with rap simply for creative expression, Jackie soon saw it as another platform to share the gospel. When asked about the albumâs title, the talented artist says, âIn music theory, âcrescendoâ means the increase in sound. So I wanted to apply that to faith. When youâre in Christ, as your faith increases, your fruit should get louder. You love more, youâre more generous, more attentive to the needs of people. You listen well. Things begin to change as your faith becomes more evident.â
She wrote the album to mimic that spiritual progression. The first track begins on a low note with âLamentations,â a rap about the reality of sin and the tendency for Jackie to forget sheâs been forgiven. Taking listeners through an honest exploration of spiritual growth, Crescendo ends on a high note, celebrating how the Lord saved Jackie through His gospel, initiated her Christian walk, and sustains her to this day.
The Power of Legacy
A gifted communicator and lyricist, Jackie isnât just impacting culture with wordcraft. Sheâs also building a spiritual legacy for her children. Because of her childhood trauma, the idea of raising daughters was terrifying. But sheâs found so much joy in becoming a mom. Jackie says, âWhen I think of parenthood, I know Iâm only called to steward these children and disciple them and hope they will love the Lord with all their hearts, souls, minds, and strength. When I was carrying Eden, Titus 2 really spoke to me about the older women teaching the younger women.
"Once I realized what a privilege it would be to raise up a woman in my home, I welcomed the challenge.â As Jackie reflects on the last decade, she gives God all the glory and praise. Without Christ, she wouldnât have her precious daughters, would have missed out on beautiful friendships, and would never have experienced being loved by a man for the first time in her life. âIf God hadnât rescued me, none of this would be possible,â Jackie says. âLife still has its challenges, for sure. But itâs better. Itâs so much better.â
This article courtesy of HomeLife magazine.
what if my singleness never ends
It happened suddenly this past May, the moment Iâd prayed for and sought after for quite some time: the moment I became okay with lifelong singleness. Something inside me relaxed as I sat at a coffee shop, my mind not even on relationships but preoccupied with a menu over dinner with friends. And then suddenly, I felt content to be single â not only for another few months, or even years, but even until the day I die, if God chooses that for me. âI donât want to skip what God chooses to give me during singleness.â More than ever before, the years stretching out before me donât seem like a romance-less, spouse-less, and (okay, letâs face it) sex-less gray void. It was a beautiful moment that could come only from God, a moment of triumph over an idol that has long battled for the throne of my heart. Whether itâs for a season or a lifetime, Iâve found that I donât want to skip what God chooses to give me during singleness. Already Loved The more weddings I attend (which is several a year at this stage of life), the more the feeling sinks in that I may never be a bride. But the feeling isnât altogether sad. Because Iâm already dressed in white, you see. My friendsâ immaculate dresses and the wedding day itself symbolize something mysterious and beautiful: the ârobe of righteousnessâ Godâs people already wear (Isaiah 61:10) and the âfine linen, bright and pureâ we will put on at the wedding feast of the Lamb (Revelation 19:8). Iâm already pursued by someone who wove the very sinews of my being together. Iâm already loved with a love that will outlast every other. Iâm already known more intimately than I can fathom. Itâs so easy to read that last paragraph and think âso clichĂ©,â especially since this is yet another  Christian article about singleness. Just be still. Do you realize what that paragraph means? Youâre known just as you are (1 Corinthians 13:12). Even the inmost places of your heart â the darkest, the brightest, the most wounded, the most joyful, the most romantic â God knows and comprehends them to their depths. He cares for your unspoken and most intimate needs. There isnât a thought you can speak before God knows itâs there (Psalm 139:4). Dwell on that. Do Godâs presence and promises carry so little preciousness that we can scoff and declare them âclichĂ©â? Faulty Assumptions So often, we spout inane phrases to single people like âGod will bring you the right guy.â They reveal the heart so completely: I have to have a romantic relationship in my life at some point to be whole. We might subtly think, I donât have to have it now, God. Or even next month. But at some point, God, youâve gotta bring someone for me to marry. But he doesnât. God does not have to bring us someone to marry. He simply is not obligated to do anything for us that is not for his glory and for our joy in him. And since weâre not all-knowing, we cannot claim to know what will give us the most long-term joy. We can make guesses, certainly. But the ultimate decision is up to our God, who has never ceased to provide exactly what his people need â from the garments of skin worn by Adam and Eve (Genesis 3:21) to our own daily bread (Matthew 6:11). âI am already loved with a love that will outlast every other.â Iâm not  saying you wonât have difficult days where you yearn to be a husband or wife (I have those days too!), but I am saying that Jesus will meet you in those difficult times. He is gloriously gracious like that. The Spirit is willing and able to teach your heart many things, including contentment in singleness as long as God sees fit â and even if itâs lifelong. Donât get me wrong: seeking marriage is great. If youâre interested in a godly someone, use wisdom and discernment and be intentional about it. But donât fret. You may marry that person, and you may not. Whatever happens, donât let it overshadow what God has already done for you and the glorious place you are headed. Three Suggestions âThatâs great,â you may say as you read this. âBut how can I do that?â I donât pretend to know the complete answer to that question, but here are three suggestions that have helped me. 1. Recognize that you canât be content on your own. Contentment is a work of God (Philippians 4:11â13). Pray to him for it. Lay your will and your heart down completely, and not in a way where youâre trying to be holy and spiritual so that you can get the âtrue prizeâ in your eyes. God can change your heart from that too; just ask. He is a Father who listens to his children. 2. Second, donât surround yourself with romance. Iâm not saying avoid all your friendsâ weddings â each is a time for rejoicing and celebrating Godâs work in their lives! But donât inundate yourself with romantic comedies and TV shows and books and other media that are constantly focused on romance. Doing this can easily irritate wounds and give a foothold for envy and comparison to wreak havoc on your emotions. 3. And third, enjoy singleness. Seriously. If youâre not content in singleness, then you wonât be content in marriage. Spouses and significant others are not contentment charms; wedding vows are not magic incantations that produce lifelong fulfillment. âIf youâre not content in singleness, then you wonât be content in marriage.â Give your time to ministering to friends and your community. Pursue your interests intently. Learn to manage your money. These activities do not have to be less fulfilling just because you are spouse-less! Believe it or not, if you do marry, there will be times when you yearn for singleness, and it isnât likely to come again (at least not in the same way). A Better Goal So I come alongside you as a fellow single, encouraging you to join me in laying down the idol of romance. Letâs prepare now to better serve a future spouse or, if we never marry, to enjoy Jesus no matter married or not. Marriage is great, but it isnât ultimate. The honor of âultimateâ remains with our true romance: the God who creates, sustains, intervenes in, and pursues the hearts of his people from eternity to eternity (Psalm 90:1â2). Amen.